


The Sharpest Lives

by Konfessor2U



Series: The Sharpest Lives [1]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alcoholism, Anal Sex, Boys Kissing, Drinking, His friends try to help, Kissing, M/M, Oral Sex, Roy is an alcoholic, Trigger?, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-23
Updated: 2014-02-23
Packaged: 2018-01-13 11:07:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1223992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Konfessor2U/pseuds/Konfessor2U
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roy drinks too much to make it to his own house every night. His friends look after him.</p><p>Not sure if this is a trigger?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. If I Crash on the Couch

**Author's Note:**

> Sort of song fic. My Chemical Romance 'The Sharpest Lives'. 
> 
> The idea for the fic was lawlietlivesforever's, who also wrote the first bit of intro to this and beta'd the whole thing. 
> 
> Fullmetal Alchemist belongs to Hiromu Arakawa, the clever girl.

Sunday Night

Roy sighed as he sat down at the bar. He rested his elbow on the wood, massaging his forehead with his palm. He was tired, but another long day of paperwork was the least of his problems. Problems, in fact that didn't seem to want to go away. The problems he had liked to stick around for a while before ending in a nasty, painful solution. And even then, there was the aftermath. At times, Roy thought the aftermath was worse; bad endings only happened once, but memories lived on forever. Memories that played again and again in Roy's head like a broken record player. And regrets. Regrets that stuck to his thoughts like bugs to flypaper.

The bartender brought him a scotch without a word, recognizing one of his regular patrons. Roy took his glass and began the process of quickly emptying it. Dousing the pain in alcohol didn't solve anything, but it'd make the pain go away for a couple hours at least

The icy ground crunched as he made his way up the path. At one time in his life, he walked this path often and nowadays when he did walk it, it was never at the right time, never appropriate. He stumbled up the steps. When he was drunk he could never seem to remember that the middle step was broken through. He and Maes had busted it when they were moving the new couch in. Maes cracked a joke and Roy laughed so hard that he couldn't hold his end of the furniture, dropping it on the steps. The whole board caved in but it was never fixed probably because of the memory it held. Normally he would skip it and jump right to the top step, but not in his current state of intoxication and so he fell to his hands and knees in front of the door.

With bleary eyes, Roy looked up into the sudden flood of light as the door opened. He squinted trying to bring one Gracia Hughes into focus and from what he could tell, she wasn't happy. Using the door frame to steady himself he stood slowly.

"Haayllo Gracia! Ca-can I come in?" Roy slurred stepping back and spreading his arms wide proclaiming, "I am soooooo fucking lost right now. I-I don't even know where I live."

"Shhhhh Roy, be quiet or you'll wake Elicia. Get in here you idiot." Gracia grabbed Roy's collar and yanked him into the house, closing the door. She went to the kitchen and Roy flopped onto the couch, the step-breaking couch, stretching and yawning.

"Hey, hey, hey, wher- what- why don't you let me see her. Does she miss her Uncle Roy?" He called to the other room.

Gracia snorted. "You need to clean up your act if you ever want to come visit her Roy. She doesn't need an alcoholic for a role model. She needs a father figure, not a drunk."  _Father figure._   _If I had done a better job she would have an actual father._ Some nights when he crashed at the Hughes' he would fight with Gracia about why he was never interested in investigating Maes' death directly. She knew Roy had loved him like a brother but couldn't understand why Roy didn't want to pursue the killer personally. She certainly wished that it was in her power to skin that homunculus herself. It wasn't comforting at all just to know that Envy killed himself on the Day of Reckoning.

_If I had been more attentive to Maes and his work he'd be here,_ he always thought.  _It should've been me. I've done enough wrong for the both of us._ These thoughts swam through his mind on the regular. Roy intended to impede their swimming with the effect of alcohol. Sometimes it worked to keep his mind at bay, other times, not as well.

She returned from the kitchen and set a glass of water on the coffee table. Roy pulled the blanket from the back of the couch snuggling down into the cushions. "Good night, Roy." He grumbled his reply already being taken by the alcohol induced sleep.

Not a moment after that the phone rang. Roy lazily turned his head to look in the direction of the offending appliance. He could hear Gracia answer it and she was speaking in hushed tones to the caller. Roy's gaze rested on a picture next to the telephone. It was a family picture of Gracia, Maes and Elicia.  _I'm so sorry Maes. And I haven't even been looking after them._  He groaned loudly making a mental note to have another drink in the morning.  _Whiskey_. With that he rolled over onto his side and let his eyes droop and his dreams take over. His dreams always left him fitful and restless. And so there goes another night.

* * *

Monday Night

Havoc's house was usually a good bet for Tuesday nights. Tuesday wasn't a great night for dates and even if Jean managed to get a date with a girl, she would most likely bail and Roy would show up to crash at his house. This was a regular occurrence. As was crashing that the Hughes house the night before. Roy didn't know if he wandered to others houses simply because he was actually too drunk to find his own or if subconsciously he did not want to be alone. Either way he hardly ever made it to his own house.

_Thank goodness Jean lives on the ground floor_ , he thought to himself as he pushed the buzzer to his apartment. An unsettling feeling rolled in his stomach as he waited for his former subordinate to answer the door. That night Roy abandoned his usual scotch whiskey on the rocks to take on not one, but two bottles of red wine. Why? He'll never know. The hallway started to spin as that all too familiar nausea began to overtake him.

By the time his friend opened the door, Roy was panting with the effort of concentrating, trying not to vomit, eyes squeezed shut.

"Roy?" Jean pressed cautiously not wanting to disturb Roy's concentration. "How ya doin' buddy?" There was no answer but Roy swayed in place where he stood. "Do you need to use the bathroom?" With barely a nod, Roy dashed past Jean in his wheelchair, into the bathroom, and proceeded to be sick in the toilet.

He sat there with his forehead resting on the toilet seat.  _How positively disgusting am I?_ He retched again.  _Whiskey and red wine don't mix well_ , he noted. He was sure it felt good at the time. Jean's voice floated into his head as he fought back a heave he knew wouldn't bring anything up. His stomach was empty and his abs were sore.

"Yeah, yeah, he's here. Yeah, of course I'll get his ass up in the morning. If I have to go to work then so does he, damn it! Mmhmm, he is pretty rough tonight, don't know what he drank but it ain't sittin'. Yeah, you too. G'night."

After he hung up the phone, Jean rolled his chair alongside Roy and waited for him to turn to him. Black charcoal eyes looked up to meet bright blues ones and for the first time Roy realized Jean was shirtless and in sweatpants. Roy did wake him up at some crazy early hour of the morning.

He attempted to rise from the floor and found that he needed to lean on Jean's chair for support, one hand on each of the armrests, head hanging. Jean was weary of this position since not a minute ago his friend was vomiting in the toilet and really didn't want him to get sick on him.

Roy's blurred gaze fixed on the scars on Jean's abdomen. Scars that he knew continued through to his back and damaged his spine on the way. Roy had similar scars but a cruel twist of reality allowed him to walk away from that fateful day. Although he had seared both of their wounds from Lust closed, Roy sill blamed himself for his subordinate's injuries and took it quite personally.

Jean sighed, knowing exactly what was going through his former superior's mind. They went through this almost every week, sometimes twice a week. Not one to dwell on the past, Jean would shake it off and ensure Roy that it wasn't his fault, he was just doing his job, and any other statement that would help take the his mind off what happened that day. Tonight Roy seemed content to simply nod his head and brood over the situation. Other nights he would cry or get angry at Jean. It was good to know that his raven-haired friend had some sort of self-control on his emotions sometimes.

Jean led Roy, who practically used the wheelchair as a walker, to the guest bedroom and gave him a shove to get him onto the bed. A grunt came from his friend as he hit the mattress and Jean knew it wouldn't be long before he would be asleep. He returned to his own bed and double checked his alarm to be sure he would be awake in the morning. He now had the responsibility of waking a hung-over Roy Mustang, which was actually quite difficult.

* * *

Tuesday Night

One positively drunk Roy Mustang stood swaying outside the apartment building of someone who should otherwise hate him. Winry Rockbell had forgiven Roy a long time ago for the death of her parents. She knew that he hated himself immensely for it. She actually admired that fact that it was so hard for him to deal with it. When she realized that he really beat himself up about it she couldn't bring herself to hate the man, she respected him.

Roy buzzed the #4 on the panel. At least he thought that apartment four was hers. There was no answer and after six or seven buzzes he cursed loudly at the door. It was freezing out here and he was way too far from home and way too drunk to attempt that walk. He was also out of money; his last bit was spent on scotch, so a taxi was out of the question. He slumped to the ground pressing his back against the ice cold brick of the building and resting his head on his knees. Without realizing it Roy fell asleep, the cold wind pulling at his black hair and biting his ears.

"General Mustang?" A voice pulled him from his dreamless sleep. He blinked dry eyes, shivering. He tried to focus on the voice personified. He knew it was Winry, but not because he could see her, not straight at least. Her form doubled and crossed many times before settling on a wider-than-Winry shape with blurry edges. He grunted in response.

She held her hand out to him and he took it knowing that without her help he would fall over. Winry opened the main front door and traversed the single flight of stairs trying not to let Roy fall back down them. Once in her apartment, she dropped her bag down and steered Roy to the couch. He sat heavily, the cushions sagging under his weight.

"I don't know why you do this to yourself, General." She said to him while helping him pull his jacket off. The fabric was stiff from the cold and got caught on his arms. "If this is punishment for yourself, just know that you are hurting more than just you." She hung his coat on a hook in the hallway and brought him a warm, thick blanket in exchange. When Roy had nothing to say about her comment, she went on. "Just think about how E-"

The phone interrupted her scolding and she jogged out of the room to pick it up. "Hello? Yes. He was sleeping  _outside_  my apartment tonight. Yeah, he is fine; he is quiet tonight. He is on the couch now. Okay, Good night."

"Never mind what I was saying. Sleep well, General." Winry turned the light off and retired to her own room.

* * *

Wednesday Night

"Sir! Stop this. You are making a fool out of yourself!" Riza put the dining room table between them effectively thwarting Roy's advances. At least for a moment, until Roy righted himself after stumbling over a chair Riza had toppled over in his path. They stood opposite each other staring and trying to decipher the other's next move. Riza's sharp eyes battled his lust filled ones. She didn't have her gun on her at the moment and while Roy was thankful, she berated herself for becoming too comfortable in her own home. At the same time, she was assured herself that it was her own house and she deserved to be able relax without having to be armed 24/7.

"Aw come on Riza! It is just a little kiss. Am I that vile?" Gripping the edge of the great oak table, Roy sidled around the bulky, upholstered chairs to get closer to her. "S'not like we haven't kissed before."

This was true. In fact, Roy was Riza's first kiss years ago when Roy was studying fire alchemy under her father. They were close. So close that there where things that he knew about her that no one else alive in this world knew. It was for this reason that she put up with his nonsense when he was drunk. He was there for her when she struggled in her youth, dealing with the abuse from her father. So she would always be there for him, even if the alcohol turned him into an asshole.

Riza had loved him once and he'd loved her but it was not the way that she wanted. The current situation of Roy desiring her was simply the alcohol talking. She knew that quite well. He had told her once that he didn't hook up with people from work and also that he never wanted anything more than just a hook up. She was hurt at first but was content to stay at his side as his most loyal subordinate; a professional relationship only.

"Sir," she cautioned, beyond crushes and loves and now firmly sticking to formalities. "If you keep this up, I'm going to have to hurt you." If he wasn't drunk he would have taken this warning seriously. Instead of backing down he lunged forward the last few steps to her and reached out his arms. Using a simple maneuver using his own weight, Riza threw Roy to the ground, his head making a loud thud on the hardwood floor.

"Ow, Riza. What the hell? That Hurt." She hated when he got whiney, which was often, especially at work.

"You deserved that, Sir. I did give you fair warning." He rolled over and crawled to the nearest chair to hoist himself off the floor. She turned and went to the living room going straight to the roll top desk where she kept one of her handguns hidden. She checked the magazine and the safety then tucked it into her belt.

Riza took a seat on the couch as Roy zig-zagged his way to the large, plush chair on the other side of the room. She was very much the night owl and was more often than not awake when Roy came around from the bars. By the time he got settled into the chair, she had her nose buried in a book, completely ignoring her drunken superior officer.

Frustrated that Riza was not paying attention to him he got up and leaned over quite exaggeratedly to inspect the title on the leather bound spine.

"Romantic. Graphic. Short Stories." He read with some difficulty, squinting his eyes to make out the fuzzy words. Roy snatched the book from her hands and opened to a random page and read aloud the first sentence he could see after his eyes focused on the blurry page.

"'He slowly slid her night gown off her shoulders to reveal soft white breasts coming to small pink peaks.' Oh Riza, this is steamy! I never knew you would be into this kinda thing." With a shit-eating grin on his face, Roy placed his hands on the back of the couch on either side of her head, trapping her. "We can reenact this book if you'd like." His eyes dipped to her chest and he gave her a quick wink.

Riza scowled at him drawing the gun from her belt. He leapt back immediately at the presentation of the weapon. He knew she would fire at him if necessary and even in his drunken state he knew better than to taunt her more.

"I'm sorry." He cowered but she wasn't buying it. She reached for his hand and bent his pinky back until it was sickeningly touching the outside of his forearm. "Ow, ow, ow, ow , please. No! Ow!" Roy cried out and twisted his shoulder to get away from the pain. It was no good. Using the leverage she now held over him, she led him to the guest bedroom, flung him in and slammed the door, smiling inwardly.

She locked her own bedroom door just so she would know he wouldn't bother her later. Roy used to be such a ladies man, dating all the time all kinds of girls and now, now his lifestyle was not doing him a service by turning him into a jerk when he got into the bottle.

Sighing to herself, Riza picked up the phone and dialed a number she knew by heart. A man answered.

"The General was difficult tonight, but I think that he is asleep now."

The man apologized to her and she laughed heartily, "He's just lucky I didn't shoot that thing right off him!"

* * *

Thursday Night

"Thanks for picking me up, Al." Roy said quietly, shutting the car door to the biting wind outside. To be honest, he actually wasn't that drunk tonight. Well he was drunk, but after his belligerent actions the night before and the result of them, he kept quiet. It was completely undignified to hear the click of the lock on Riza's door after she had manhandled him into submission, not a position he was used to.

He had been a real jerk and the heavy weight of embarrassment laid on him this morning like an elephant. He could only pull a few flashes from his memory. One of which he was on the floor and in the other, he was really close to his friend's face saying something rather rude.

Work that day was painful both physically and mentally. To add to the skull splitting headache he had most mornings nowadays, the lieutenant, who was always professional in the way of addressing him, downright ignored him while going about her tasks. In a way this was good for him as there was no one to prod him along to do his work; he looked out the window and took a cat nap, which was very much needed, whenever he liked.

Watching the lamp posts zip by, Roy rested his head on the cool glass of the window. He wanted to believe that a night like last night wouldn't happen again but he knew as long as he drank, there would be nights like those. He sighed rather loudly and stretched back into the passenger's seat and took up the task of inspecting a spot on the ceiling of Alphonse's car.

Al stole a quick glance at the general. "Uh, Sir? Are you feeling alright? You seem quiet." Normally at this point the general would give a relentless, in depth account of his night at the bar, his tale usually concerning a woman and how easy it was for him to seduce her. Al was unsettled at his silence and thought perhaps for once this drinking streak was taking its toll on the man.

"Yeah. Of course I'm fine. I'm living the life, ya know? Al, why don't you ever come out with me? I could introduce you to some pretty girls."

"I'm seventeen, Sir. Even if I could drink, I wouldn't. Plus I've got Winry, I don't need any other pretty girls." Al was grinning at the thought of Winry. He couldn't wait to take her out to dinner tomorrow night.

"Oh right. You probably wouldn't want to hang out with me anyway." Roy sulked. "No one wants to. No one really cares about me." The sudden onset of depression made Al pull a face as Roy sat next to him, arms crossed and pouting like a child.

"That's not true." Al stated, but neither of them said anymore on the subject. "Am I taking you to your house or mine?" He asked since they were at an intersection where he'd have to go one way or the other.

"Yours please. I don't want to be alone tonight."

"Of course."

Later that night when Roy was all tucked in and fast asleep on Al's couch with a furry ball of warmth weighing on his chest, Al picked up the phone. He watched the breathing of the sleeping form on the couch as he waited for an answer on the other end of the line.

"Hello?" The voice laced with concern.

"Hey, Brother. The general is here tonight."


	2. I'm Drunk I Suppose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ed has to take care of Roy's drunk ass.

Friday Night

Edward Elric stood outside of the bar Mustang frequented looking up at the rusty sign swinging in the wind and snow, red hood pulled up against the weather. It's not the first time he received a call from the bar owner to come pick up the drunkard. Most nights the man found his own way out the bar but every once in a while he got rowdy and was kicked out.

Mustang had picked a fight with another patron and the owner of the joint was detaining him in the back room. He sighed to himself thinking that he really didn't want to deal with an angry, violent, and really drunk Mustang. Flexing his fists, Ed steeled himself for bringing The Flame Alchemist under control. He pushed open the heavy oak door and shook his head causing the hood to fall back revealing his long golden hair neatly tied in a ponytail.

Snowflakes were still melting from his bangs as Ed waved to the bartender on his way past to the backroom. After all, this was the third time in one month that Edward had to come collect the General. He knew the staff here quite well.

"Hiya Ed!" the bartender called, waving his dish rag in the air and then continued mopping up the bar counter. Ed sent silent words to whatever greater power there may be in the world that Mustang was not in possession of his ignition gloves. One occasion of an inebriated Flame Alchemist was enough for the entire city of Central. Ever. Ed had to return to that particular bar the next morning and transmute it back to the way it was. He never mentioned it Mustang.

Before he could even reach for the door handle to the back store room, he heard struggling coming from the other side. In a panic, hoping that he wouldn't see flames licking out from under the door, he burst through.

His heart dropped to his stomach when he saw Mustang breathing raggedly, leaning against the wall and a black eye and cuts all over his face, blood running into his eyes. The bar owner was on the floor moaning and clutching his stomach. Mustang was reaching into the inside of his coat for something.  _Shit,_  Ed cursed to himself.

There was a moment when Mustang looked up and caught Ed's eye. The sneer he gave him made Ed feel extremely uneasy. He would rather fight another homunculus than deal with a drunk Mustang and his flame alchemy.

A flask. The shiny metal reflected the light from the ceiling into Ed's eyes.

Ed growled furiously and just as Mustang touched the flask to his lips he smacked it out his hands, spilling the precious, golden liquid on the floor.

"Are you a fucking idiot, Mustang?" Ed yelled in a tone a parent would use for their defiant teenager. He had to kick the flask away from them as Mustang tried to pick it up. Ed grabbed the front of the older man's coat push him back against the wall. Manipulating the supple, slow-to-respond body was easy and he had the upper hand, despite his height.

"Fullmetal." The "L" sound disappeared somewhere in the slur and his official title sounded something like "Foometa." Golden eyes shot daggers waiting for the drunk to start making some sense. He tried again. "Fullmetal." This time there was too much "L" sound and the title was drawn out to ridiculous proportions. Seemingly just noticing the bar owner on the floor for the first time, Mustang cocked his head to the side and shifted his eyes from the groaning man to Ed and back a few times. "What ha-happened?" He started to move forward but a gentle shove from Ed kept him where he was.

"You punched me is what happened, Roy!" The man attempted to stand but decided that staying on the floor took the least amount of effort and caused minimal pain. As well as the bar owner holding his tender belly, Ed could see a few bruises starting to form on his cheeks and forehead. "It was a low blow too; knocked the wind outta me. Now get the hell outta here before I make a call to your higher ups."

Ed, being sober, knew that was the last chance to leave the bar before Mustang got into serious trouble. He dragged the General out through the front door by the lapel of his jacket and once outside he shoved him into the nearest snow bank.

Mustang scrambled to his feet, slipping several times and landing on his ass, but he finally made it to his feet. Ed stood a few feet away watching him with amused concern.

"What the fuck, Fullmetal?" The cold snow on his face seemed to sober him up a bit and he was furiously trying to warm his hands with his breath. "What'd ya do that for?"

"You were being a bastard and you beat up the owner of that bar! What the hell were you thinking? He could've called the Fuhrer. One more fuck up and you are out, Mustang." Ed started up the sidewalk and Mustang followed obediently, shoving his hands into his pockets and stumbling.

No words were spoken the entire way but when they came to the front of Ed's house, Mustang mumbled a 'thank you' and Edward opened the front door, letting them in from the cold.

Whenever he asked if Mustang wanted Ed to walk him back to his own house, the reply was almost always a plead to not be left alone and so he didn't even ask anymore. Ed knew how deep Mustang's problems ran, from the war in Ishval to the late Brigadier-General Hughes and even to Ed and Al's problems getting their bodies back. He took things painfully to a personal level and alcohol was Mustang's way of fixing it.

Ed didn't agree with his methods, especially since he ended up taking care of his drunken ass a few days a week. He felt a responsibility toward the general in a way he would've laughed in his own face about years ago.

"Hey, do you have any food? I'm fuckin' starvin'," Mustang called from the kitchen and Ed could hear things, boxes and cans most likely, falling to the floor as the cabinets were perused by the older man. Ed rolled his eyes and pushed Mustang into a chair at the small table in the kitchen. He picked up the fallen items and replaced them as they were.

"I've got left over take out you can have. Just promise you won't throw it up later." He opened the fridge to retrieve the paper box of noodles and sauce, dumped them into a pot and set it on the stove top. After turning the heat up, he set a timer. Ed turned back to the general, leaning against the counter. Al told him never to cook without a timer since he all too often got caught up in research and let the food burn. "Scrubbing Xingese vomitus from my carpet fibers is not the way I usually like spending my nights," he huffed.

Mustang's face fell at that and he looked very sad all of a sudden. His eyes were directed down and Ed thought he saw tears accumulating in the corners.

"I'm sorry. I'm always just a problem." He stood, running his hands through his black hair and he still didn't look up at Ed. "You don't need to have me here. I'm just trouble for you." Mustang shuffled around in place and Ed narrowed his golden eyes at him. "I'll just go. I'll figure out how to get home. No one cares if I'm wandering around Central this late."

Mustang tried to step past Ed towards the door but an automail hand to his chest stopped him. "No one cares about you?" He raised an eyebrow in question.

"Not about a wretch like me; I drink too much. I can barely keep a friendly relationship without ruining it. No one cares what happens to me." Mustang finally looked down at Edward and noted the scowl he wore. The timer dinged, signaling that the noodles were done. Ed reached to turn the heat off but neither of them moved to eat.

Ed was fuming at the stupidity coming from the man in front of him.  _No one cares? What the hell am I doing right now?_  He swung before he thought of it, his left fist contacting Mustang's jaw with a satisfying crack. The man was knocked back into the kitchen chair, which teetered back on two legs before settling on all four.

"Fucking brat," was all he could get out as he stood and lunged for the blonde. He landed a poorly aimed but powerful punch which hit Ed's shoulder where his automail connected to his body. The pain was searing and while he could only see white, Mustang hit him again, this time the punch found its mark, his face.

Ed cried out and fell onto the kitchen floor. Mustang advanced but was too slow to react as Ed kicked up into his stomach. This brought the drunken general to the floor and Ed saw his opportunity for the upper hand. He rolled over on his hands and knees, crawled to Mustang and straddled his torso. Ed punched down at him repeatedly, now furious in his attack and only making contact half of the time. His eyes were blurred by some emotion he couldn't quite put his finger on.

Ed was thrown off and he hit the cabinets with a loud crash but he shook his head to clear it. Both men stood slowly, regarding each other with caution, not wanting to be the one to be hit next. Golden orbs locked with endless pools of black and the two stood panting, bleeding and angry.

"You're a fucking bastard, Mustang. And you're stupid."

"And you are a tiny, little brat. I can't believe you were able to hit me from way down there."

Ed twitched slightly at this but didn't take the bait. Mustang was impatient though. Only the small shift of his left foot and slight turn of his torso gave him away. Ed saw it coming and ducked under the arm and cut up at Mustang's chin with his right hand, effectively knocking him out cold on the floor.

"Shit. You bastard." He quickly assessed the damage he had caused to the older man and decided that although his face was covered in bruises and cuts, Ed managed to not break any of his bones. He sighed with relief as sometimes his automail hit harder than he intended.  _At least he is quiet now. He thinks no one cares about him. Is that what this drinking shit is all about? He is in so deep, he can't even see._

It took all the energy he had left to drag the unconscious general from the kitchen to his bedroom, where after much effort he put Mustang in the bed. Ed removed Mustang's jacket and boots and used a warm cloth to wipe away the blood from his face, talking as he went. He was pretty sure that he couldn't hear him.

"There are so many people that care about you. You'd probably be dead without them. Without  _us_. Gracia, Havoc, Lieutenant Hawkeye, Alphonse, and hell, even Winry." Ed laughed to himself, picturing Winry beating a violent, drunk Mustang into submission with one of her wrenches.  _I call everyone every night to find out where you are. You owe me, you asshole._  "People care. You are just too stubborn to notice."  _Or too drunk_.

Ed turned out the light and went for a quick shower. He got comfortable on the couch and fell asleep thinking about the man that currently resided in his bed. Hardly a night passed that his mind isn't filled with thoughts of Mustang and a part of Ed hated the responsibility he felt that he had for him and another part swelled with pride that he could make such a difference in someone's life.  _It won't make much of a difference if he continues down this path, as we all watch him corrode. He needs to change._


	3. You're the One that I Need, I'm the One that You Loath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are looking brighter for Roy... Like blonde hair and golden eyes.

Ed woke before noon, which was somewhat unheard of but the sun was relentless and he quickly regretted forgoing curtains for the living room space. He ate a small breakfast, made coffee, read the  _Amestris Times_ , tidied the living room and kitchen, and read a chapter in his alchemy research book. He was bored to say the least and it was time to wake Mustang anyway.

Red blotches had already given way to bluish purple spots, and in a few days the skin would be mottled with a greenish/yellow tint as the contusions healed. Ed knew his own face held similar bruises. He gazed down at the battered general over the rim of his coffee mug while deciding on the best way to wake him. He briefly considered not even waking him and just watching him sleep. He finally had the general in his bed, even though it wasn't entirely the way he wanted. He didn't want to be creepy but Mustang did look peaceful sleeping there. He shook the thought from his head before it even finished. He had enough on his mind already without thoughts like that floating in his head.  _Where did these thoughts come from?_

With a scowl Edward pushed an index finger to a tender blue spot on the forehead of the sleeping form. It yielded the immediate result of Mustang yowling and swatting away the offending hand.

"Ow! What the hell?" Mustang sat up looking around to find out where he was. "Fullmetal?" He took in more of his surroundings as Ed walked back out to the living room, ignoring him.  _Ed's house again_. With an exasperated sigh he fell back on to the pillows, scrubbing the sleep from his eyes. As usual, this morning he had a pounding headache; there were few mornings he woke without one. A glance down his body told him he was still clothed and he gave a sigh of relief. That was one less thing he'd have to be embarrassed about.

The room swam around him as he bent to put his shoes back on. He gathered his coat from the chair alongside the bed and kept a hand on the wall, making his way to the hall and on to the living room. The light from the front windows was bright and he kept his head down to avoid his brain from being stabbed by the rays of sun. He gave a small, barely visible smile Ed's way.  _He's right. I'd would definitely be dead without them._

Mustang was shifting his feet to prepare himself to walk to the door without the help of the wall when Ed snatched the coat from his grasp, replacing it with a hot cup of coffee and two pain killer pills. "Stay." It was an order, not a request. After regarding the younger man carefully, Mustang nodded and slowly made his way to the couch and sat, clutching the coffee tightly.

Ed retrieved his own mug from the kitchen and flopped onto the opposite end of the couch, lounging back and resting his automail ankle up on his other knee, one arm draped over the back of the sofa.

What felt like a lifetime of silence had passed as each of the men took sips of coffee. Without looking at the other, Mustang spoke up. "Thank you, Fullmetal." The blond's eye brows rose slightly. This show of gratitude was rare from the general. "You were right." Ed turned his body toward the general tucking one foot underneath him. He was now very interested in what the man had to say.

"Also, I'm sorry…For fighting you." Roy concentrated into his coffee mug, not turning to look at the blond and picking at a small thread on the couch armrest.

Ed scoffed a bit. "I hit you first Mustang. You didn't exactly get off scot free." A finger absentmindedly pressed a bruise on his own face while waiting to see what Mustang would say.

"I can only imagine what I said to start you off. Did I call you short?" A small smile played on Mustang's lips and Ed growled and his eye twitched slightly. "Really though, I am sorry. You didn't have to even come get me."

"And if I didn't?" Ed pressed.

Mustang swirled the last of his coffee and swallowed it quickly. "Well, I'd have found a place to go; either my house or a friend's." He shrugged nonchalantly.

Ed crossed his arms and couldn't help but feel a little offended. Before this reckless drinking episode, the two were simply co-workers and butted head most every day. Now that Ed took to looking after Mustang's drunken ass, they were closer. They were friends right? He pouted watching the general with narrowed eyes. "Am I not a friend? What's the problem with coming to my house?"

"I…well…that…" Mustang shook his head furiously and tried to start over, running his hands through smooth black hair. "I didn't mean it like that. I only meant that you do too much for me. I don't deserve it."

"Who says that you don't deserve to be looked after? Or are you too proud, Bastard?" His voice was calm, and it left Mustang feeling uneasy. It wasn't like Ed to be calm like this, especially when he thought Ed should be pissed that they got in a fist fight last night. The tension in the living space was thick.

"Anything but proud, really," Mustang scrubbed his face his hands, slumped back into the couch cushions and turned his head toward Ed. Their gazes locked for a few moments before he continued. "You were so right. I would be dead without you guys. I realize that now and I'm sorry that I've abused that fact."

Ed was shocked and his mouth lay wide open in surprise. This was the beginning of self-actualization on Mustang's part. Upon seeing his reaction, Mustang groaned and rolled his head away, covering his eyes with his forearm. As if he didn't feel embarrassed enough with all these other adults taking care of him, who is also an adult, Ed had to look so surprised that he would feel bad about how he acted. Mustang  _did_  feel bad about how he has acted the last few months. Feeling terrible about it just drove him to drink more. It was a downward spiral and it twisted fast and sharp.

Edward leaned forward to grasp Mustang's wrist and pull it away from his face. It came away with no objection and the man's eyes were squeezed shut. "Mustang?" It was a barely audible whisper from Ed's lips and the other man practically flinched at the sound after so long of quiet. Ed kept hold of his hand in his own automail one.

"Please, call me Roy. You and I both know we are far past being formal with each other. I don't even really deserve to be called your superior. I know I can't go on being like this for much longer." He sulked but continued, "I know it was you." Roy gave Ed's hand a small squeeze. "You've been looking after me and have been making sure I've been safe every night. I don't even know what to say or do. I thought you hated me." Roy eyes remained shut and Ed was thankful that he couldn't see the emotions that he could no longer hide flash across his face.

Ed was happy that Roy had finally admitted that others care about him, particularly Ed himself. He was sad that Roy felt he had to drink to deal with his issues, alone to top it off. He was angry at Roy for being so stupid about it. He was confused for what he felt for the man and wondered why he cared about him so much. He was warm, the heat was seemingly radiating from their hands touching and it made him crave more of the feeling.

Standing with Roy's hand still in his, Ed pulled the other off the couch to stand. He boldly looked directly up into those inky black eyes. "You can start by not going out to the bar tonight and have dinner with me instead."

The silence stretched between them as Roy considered the offer searching Ed's face of a hint on insincerity. When he found none and deemed the offer to be sincere and Ed actually looked hopeful, Roy simply nodded.

The grin in response to the nod nearly split Ed's face in half and Roy had to smile a little, feeling the slightest bit satisfied that he caused such a smile. It was easy to admit to Ed that he'd been an ass with his drinking problem and also come to terms that he had to change. It wasn't a want-to, it was a have-to. The fact that Ed knew so much about him and his past that questions were never needed made it easier.

Roy gave Ed's hand a reassuring squeeze and his own hand lingered a bit before reluctantly letting go and scooping his coat up. He didn't really want to leave but he knew he'd be back in a couple of hours. "I really need a shower right now but what time do you want to have dinner?"

"Come by at about seven o'clock. I figured since we both look like shit at the moment it would be best to stay in. I'll cook or we can get take out." Ed put on his best poker face while stating that he would cook. He never really cooked, he just didn't want to admit that he couldn't.

"Seven works for me." Roy calculated that subtracting walking and shower time, he would be able to nap for at least five hours. He was thankful for having the day off.

Edward escorted Roy to the door and closed it after watching the man walk off down the sidewalk. He turned his back to the door and slid down to the floor. He sighed, putting his head in his hands.  _I don't know how to cook and it would just be stupid if we got take out. Shit. I gotta call Al. He'll know what to do._  Ed quickly dashed about the house to start making preparations for later that night.


	4. You Can Take All the Pain Away from Me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ed makes dinner for Roy.

Dried pasta lay scattered across the floor, tomato sauce was splattered up the backsplash and flakey garlic skin stuck to his fingers. This endeavor was a disaster. Al had told him he should stick to making something simple like spaghetti and garlic bread but things weren't quite going as planned. Ed found he was extremely clumsy in the kitchen which was the complete opposite of how adept he was with his alchemy training.

Although the pasta was ready to plate and the bread was still in the oven, the kitchen was less than presentable. Ed frantically glanced at the clock, which read 6:55pm, as he tried to clean up the mess. He went through about ten kitchen towels wiping up all the spilled tomato sauce and water that overflowed from boiling pots. The pasta on the floor was swept into the corner, hidden by the shadow of a chair.

Upon hearing the door bell, Ed had a minor freak out. He looked down at himself and noted that his shirt was covered in the assorted ingredients of the night's dinner. He growled and tore the shirt off over his head and retrieved a clean one from his room. He just barely finished pulling the hem down as he opened the front door. The general looked well put together with his black slacks and plain white button-up shirt, his coat slung over one arm. Ed noticed the top few buttons were left undone to reveal delicious looking collar bones.

He smiled nervously at the black haired man and opened the door wider for him to enter. "I…uh…I made spaghetti and sauce. Is that alright? If it isn't then we can get something else. I just thought it would be nice to have a home cooked meal. Al gave me the recipe and I…." Ed realized he was rambling when he caught sight of Roy watching him with raised eyebrows and a small smirk on his face. "Right. Yeah. Come on in." When the blond took Roy's coat to hang it on a hook, he felt what could only be a flask in the inside pocket of the jacket. Frowning, Ed turned to his guest, preparing to rant if necessary.

They both jumped a little when the timer in the kitchen went off. Ed gasped remembering the bread and rushed to the oven to remove the pan. Roy followed him and sat at the table. "Can I help you with anything, Ed?" The sound of his name coming from Roy's lips made Ed blush. He liked the deep, resonating voice of his superior. He was glad that he was turned toward the counter so the other couldn't see his face.

"Eh, no. I've got it. This is the last thing and now it is done." He reached into the oven with a towel. In his flustered, careless state, Ed forgot to fold the towel to thicken it. The heat shot through the thin material and burnt his left hand and he promptly dropped the pan to the floor.

"Fuck! Fuck! Oww… Shit fuck. That hurt!" Curses rolled from his lips and he kicked the oven door shut with an automail foot, leaving a dent in the metal. Ed put his hand to his mouth and sucked on finger that was most burnt.

Roy stood swiftly and pulled Ed's hand from his lips and guided him to the sink where he ran cold water over the quickly forming blisters. He'd had his fair share of burns in his life and knew how to relieve the sting of heat. Roy kept a firm grip on Ed's hand but their hips bumped together as they stretched over the sink. The two jumped away from each other faster than Ed had let go of the scalding hot bread pan.

Roy's face had gone a very bright shade of red and his hands retracted fast as lightening to sit on the top of his head as if to show he wasn't touching anywhere inappropriate. Ed laughed nervously but continued to run the cold water over his hand, a pink blush touching his own cheeks. "Ah, thanks Roy." When his fingers were starting to go numb, he turned off the water and with yet another towel, he gently dried his hands. "Um, let's eat now." He indicated the kitchen table with a wave of the towel. Roy nodded and helped Ed set the table, both avoiding the others eyes and barely speaking.

As they ate, Ed thought about what this situation was going to become. He had invited Roy over because he sincerely didn't want the man out drinking for another night and he genuinely cared about him. For the last month or so, Roy had been spending every evening destroying his liver with alcohol and Ed had been checking in on him every night. Now that Roy realized that Ed cared so much for him, Ed secretly hoped that Roy would want to stay the night with him, even if nothing happened between them. He didn't even know how Roy felt about their situation.  _He came over for dinner didn't he?_

Edward always knew that he didn't like girls. Ever since the night he and Al had a sleep over with Winry and the three decided to try kissing, he had known. Ed just wasn't aroused by Winry like Al was. It didn't take long after meeting the general, the lieutenant-colonel back then, to realize he was attracted to the man.

Edward chanced a glance at Roy who was slowly pulling food off his fork, lips forming perfectly about the utensil. Captivated by the sight, Ed was gaping at him.  _Does he even know how sexy he is? I can't even stand it, especially when he isn't drinking like a fish._  He lowered his gaze to his food just in time to not get caught looking at Roy.

They sat in the living room drinking coffee after they had finished eating, chatting about work. It seemed as if they were in the same position they were in that morning on the couch and it felt that the rest of the day hadn't passed like it did, except for one thing. Ed was sitting closer to Roy than he was that morning. It wasn't intentional but they were close enough that Ed's leg which was crossed over the other just barely brushed Roy's.

"Ed. I want to thank you again." Roy said in his smooth, deep voice.

"You don't have to. I wanted to do this for you." Ed dared to place a gentle hand on Roy's arm. He figured that this could be taken as entirely platonic or it could be interpreted as something more. Ed hoped for more. "I hate to see you beat yourself up for everything that has happened, especially when it comes to Al and I. I'd have to be an idiot to think that you didn't care. You do care and I know that is why you are so harsh on yourself. There are other ways to deal with the pain and stress." Ed didn't really know where all of this insight came from; he just said whatever came to his mind; all of it true. He gently squeezed the forearm in his grasp.

Roy turned his gaze to the golden eyes of his subordinate and gave him the slightest smile. _I've been destroying myself and I think maybe Ed can help me. He does care about me._ Roy placed his other hand over Ed's and squeezed. Two words that Ed thought he would never hear finally fell from Roy lips.

"Show me."


	5. A Kiss and I Will Surrender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sex.

"Show me"

The words breathed from Roy's mouth were all the encouragement that Edward needed. Without taking his eyes off of his soon-to-be lover's, Ed carefully removed the coffee mug from Roy's grasped and placed both mugs on the end table. He stood slowly to place himself directly in front of Roy. Ed leaned down toward the raven haired man to rest his hands on his thighs. Roy's whole body stiffened at the unfamiliar, but not unwanted touch.

To Roy, it seemed that Ed was moving impossibly slow. He knew what he wanted, what he needed and he was hoping that Edward would give it to him. He watched his subordinate carefully and quietly, silently pleading with him to just make his move already.

Ed was just smiling at him, as if he was simply amazed by Roy. The golden orbs didn't miss a single centimeter of his face. They drifted from his eyes to his hair, his ears, his nose, back to his eyes again and finally to his lips, where they lingered. Under his intense gaze, Roy began to crumble and feel self-conscious but before he had the chance to look away, Ed raised a hand to his face lightly outlining the bruise around his eye. It extended to his hair and almost as far down as his jaw. Roy had to suppress a shiver as Ed's finger traced his jawline and held his chin in place.

Ed leaned forward to put his lips to Roy's. It was the most feather light kiss Roy had ever experienced but it was not without effect. Roy's body reacted dramatically; his heart fluttered and at the same time his chest tightened as he pulled in a sharp breath. The feeling spread through his entire body, leaving him breathless and craving more.

Quite pleased with himself, Edward smiled a bit. It was a fleeting smile though and he immediately became very serious. "I'm sorry." He whispered against Roy's lips.

Still in shock from Edward's kiss, Roy sat back on the couch, hands at his sides and chuckled. "What? What the hell are you sorry for, Ed?" He asked, his voice failing him at first.

A gentle hand cupped Roy's face and Ed ran his thumb over a scab where skin had split from being beaten with his automail fist. "For this. I'm sorry for fighting with you like that." While Edward rested his weight on one hand on the back of the couch, the other wove its way into the thick black hair of the man below him. He placed gentle kisses on each and every scrape and bruise on Roy's face. "I never want to hurt you like that again."

Their lips were a hair's breadth apart and Ed slowly climbed onto the cushions, one knee on either side of the flame alchemist, his eyes never leaving Roy's. Roy was still taken aback by Ed forwardness and sat frozen on the couch. Inside his head, he was screaming, begging Ed to do something.

As if Ed could read his mind, their lips met a second time. This kiss was more passionate and needy than the last, but Ed lips still remained closed. Roy whimpered against the blonde's mouth at being denied access to further explore with his tongue.

Edward pulled away and sat back on Roy's lap, slowly undoing the buttons of his dress shirt. The pace Ed set was agonizing and nothing but a tease. Roy held back a growl, grinding his teeth.

With eyes still focused sharply on the circular bits of plastic in his fingers, Ed spoke again. "Tell me why you brought the flask in your coat tonight, Roy." When he was done with the last button, he looked the man square in the eyes.

Roy was hoping that Ed wouldn't have noticed the flask in his pocket. "I bring it everywhere." He heaved a tired sigh before continuing. "It helps me relax knowing that I always have the option to have a drink to unwind, especially at work. When I get stressed or upset, I know I have an out." He looked away from the blond, fiddling with the hem of his now unbuttoned shirt. "It's just…sometimes…well…" He faltered, unsure of how to say it without seeming weak and helpless. "I drink because it takes away the pain. All the things that plague my every waking thought and every dream disappear when I am drunk. I just want to forget it all."

The silence stretched between them until Ed finally decided that Roy was done explaining himself. He practically attacked the man under him, tongue pressing into Roy's mouth, which opened willingly to be ravaged. Roy wasn't sure in this heated mess where he should put his hands. He was undoubtedly aroused but still completely shocked, so he tentatively rested them on the top of Ed's belt, fingers becoming bolder as time went.

An automail hand gripped Roy's hair and pulled not too gently to expose the smooth, creamy skin of his neck. Ed smiled to himself as he placed a soft, wet kiss to the racing pulse he found there. There was something so arousing about actually seeing the pulse beat through Roy's veins, knowing that he caused the arousal. "Roy, I'll make you forget. Let me help you." He said with another kiss to Roy's sweet lips.

"Ed, please," Roy pleaded stretching his neck out to meet Ed's lips. He groaned when his blond lover pulled back and tugged on his hair again. He felt warm breath ghosting down his neck and then teeth.

Edward was thrilled that he finally got to mark Roy as his and he set to the task of biting and sucking on Roy's collar bone. The once crisp white dress shirt was messily pushed down off of broad shoulders and Ed trailed a line of kisses across Roy's clavicle and down his arm to his wrist, where he gently pulled soft flesh in his teeth.

They made no effort to prevent their moans from surfacing and Ed thought that Roy looked absolutely beautiful laid back into the couch cushions. Ed had his lover gasping and grabbing at the couch as his mouth worked lower and lower, pants sliding down over his fully hardened arousal. Roy's skin felt like hot embers under him and Ed wanted to feel all of it at once.

A tongue dipped into his navel, teeth tugged on the skin stretched over his hip bones; Roy couldn't take the teasing anymore and groaned loudly when Ed's hot breath passed over his aching member completely ignoring it. Ed gently nipped the thin skin at the joining of Roy's leg and body.

"What are you thinking about now?" Ed's voice came to him from far away it seemed and Roy had to pull his focus from the administrations of the blond to respond.

"Only," he sucked in a sharp breath as Ed's warm, wet mouth wrapped around him, but he fought to get the words out. "Only you, Ed. Aaaha, your mouth." The older man groaned throatily as he felt himself being completely swallowed. He couldn't even begin to fathom how Ed took his entire length into his mouth but then again, he didn't really care. It felt so good.

Ed removed Roy from his mouth and smirked. "Good. That is how I want it." Ed sucked on his own fingers, coating them in saliva and continued pumping Roy with his other hand. He was enjoying the way Roy was watching him, lips parted, pupils blown wide and eyelids half shut. He wanted to forget and Ed was determined to make it so; he'd been waiting for this opportunity for a very long time. Ed only wanted to see Roy completely undone beneath him.

Ed leaned forward to kiss his lover while a slicked hand slid down to massage Roy's entrance. He slowly drew circles with his fingers around it and whispered, lips just barely touching the shell of Roy's ear. "So, do you really want to forget?"

Roy shivered violently in response and turned his face to capture his lover's lips in a possessive kiss. Ed pulled away and didn't let the kiss go on for too long and he chuckled.  _I'll take that as a yes._ He slowly pressed his finger into Roy while again taking the thick, hard member in his mouth.

Roy was completely relaxed, head thrown back and hips bucking up into Ed's throat. Edward gladly let Roy thrust into his mouth while he added two more fingers without warning. The dark haired man was shocked for only a millisecond as Ed's mouth was licking him from root to tip, distracting him from the intrusion.

Ed grinned devilishly as he moved his fingers in and out of the man excruciatingly slow, curling them upwards to brush Roy's prostate, eliciting the most delicious moans. Ed pressed a kiss to the inside of Roy's thigh. "What are you thinking about now?" he hummed against flushed skin.

Roy managed to cast his eyes downward and focus on the face framed by golden locks. Just as he opened his mouth to answer, Ed stroked that spot again. Roy keened loudly and the moan melded into a sort hysterical laughter while the man tried to collect himself and catch his breath.

Removing his fingers from his lover, Ed stretched up to Roy for a kiss, deep and wanton, while tweaking a nipple. He rushed to remove his own clothing while Roy watched, stroking himself.  _He is so damn sexy_ , Roy thought to himself, admiring Ed's lean, muscular body, shaped from years of Ed's own erection was released, the older man growled deep in his throat and reached out to work it with his hands. His effort to return the pleasure to his lover was thwarted with a slap. Ed was grinning ear to ear as he dug around the end table drawer for lube. Roy scowled at him.

Edward pushed the general back to lie down on the couch and he knelt between his legs. He bent to suck on pert, pink nipples and nip his way down the side of his rib cage, earning him a wiggle from the man under him. He paused only to slick himself with lube.

Pulling the other's legs up onto his shoulders, Ed placed himself at Roy's entrance. He kissed Roy's ankles and slowly began to push in. He watched his lover's face screw up tight as he slipped further in and their eyes met for a moment. Edward mumbled an apology and bit down on Roy's calf, making him see stars.

He could feel when Roy finally relaxed and he began to move. The sounds spilling from his mouth were an indication that Ed was succeeding in making Roy forget all his problems. The air was filled with incoherent words and breathless moans. Edward only wanted the man to think of him and he started to thrust a little harder. Each time he hit home, Roy grunted, the deep throaty sound pulling at Ed to move faster.

Roy made a move to stroke himself but again his hand was slapped away. "Ed," he pleaded, desperate for completion. "Please," he begged. Ed let his dark haired lover's legs fall to his side and he pressed hot, wet, needy lips to Roy's. The sensation of Roy's burning hot skin against his own chest made Ed growl and fuck him faster, the angle changing completely and leaving the man as useless as a ragdoll.

Taking pity on him, Ed took Roy's hot, hard member in his hand and pulled in time with his thrusts. His thumb ran over the tip and back down again, spreading the precious droplets that formed at the end. Both men were locked eye to eye, taking each other in, reveling in the moans and pants of the other.

After speeding up and fucking him hard and fast until it seemed Roy was about to come, Ed slowed to what Roy felt was a complete stop after being thoroughly pounded. Ed would pull all the way out and slow as ever, push back in while working Roy's erection.

Roy saw white flash behind his eyes as his orgasm rocked him. All it took were a few thrusts harder than the others and it wasn't long. He was keening loudly making Ed grateful he had his own house without close neighbors.

Feeling the pulsing warmth surrounding him, squeezing him impossibly tight, Ed followed close behind, releasing inside his lover with irregular jerking hip thrusts. He thrust one last time, hard and deep earning him a happy sigh, before pulling out.

Ed crawled over Roy and nestled his face into his neck, kissing and nibbling there. "Have you forgotten what you were so worried about?"

Still catching his breath, Roy covered his eyes with his forearm. "Ed, I can barely remember my own name right now."

"Good." Ed smiled into his lover's neck, 100% pleased with himself and entirely satisfied.


	6. So Bright the Sun is Ashamed to Rise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wouldn't be sex without the awkward morning after, plus one.

"Brother?" Al nudged open the front door and closed it behind him with a swing of his leg. His arms were full of books and he placed them on the kitchen table, straightening the pile before he moved into the living room, searching for his brother.

"Ed? I brought the books you asked for. Are you here?" The sight before him made him pause. He smiled fondly at the pair on the couch, asleep in each other's arms, his brother on top between the General's legs. Edward stirred at the voice and lazily opened an eye. When he registered that his brother was standing at the end of the couch, he became acutely aware that he and Roy were naked and Al was just staring at them with a stupid grin on his face.

He tried to stand up quickly but fell backwards off the couch with flailing limbs. Scrambling to stand, Edward grabbed the nearest pair of pants and shoved his legs in. "What the hell, Al?" He hissed under his breath, glancing at his partner who remained innocently asleep, unperturbed but the commotion.

With a growl, he grabbed his little brother's upper arm and dragged him to the kitchen. "What are you doing here?" Ed glanced back toward the living room and continued under his breath. "If you speak a word of this to anyone, even Winry, you'll wish we never got your body back, you got it?"

Al was still amused, even after considering his brother's threat. He knew that Edward would never hurt him intentionally and he couldn't wipe the smile off his face. "You two are finally together I take it." The light blush that already painted Ed's cheeks darkened and it spread to the rest of his face and neck. "Oh come on, Ed. It's not like anyone would be surprised by the news. We all know you care about him." Al waved his hand arbitrarily in the air and turned to the table, indicating the pile of books. "These are the ones you asked for. I figured I'd better drop them off before I head to work."

Ed was still in shock from being caught red handed with his new lover, so he simply nodded his head. It was his own house and he knew that he shouldn't feel ashamed by what happened under his own roof, but he couldn't shake the feeling of being a school child caught holding hands in the hallway or passing notes to his crush in class. This situation was without a doubt more serious and far less than innocent.

Ed saw his brother out and let go of the breath he'd been holding.  _Was it that obvious I was attracted to him?_ He couldn't hold back a grin when he re-entered the living room. Roy was the definition of sexy, even when asleep. The man was older than him yes, but his body didn't show it. Ed could tell that Roy took care of the rest of his body regardless of the abuse his liver withstood. Ed wiggled out of the trousers that he'd grabbed in haste and climbed on top of said sexy man.

Gentle kisses were placed on the pale and scarred but otherwise well-defined chest below him and he moved to straddle Roy hips. Edward trailed up to Roy's neck, where he paid extra attention to the bruises that where proof of what happened the night before.

The groan that escaped Roy's mouth was raspy and thick, and Ed had to use every last bit of self-restraint to not take the soft pale flesh into his teeth again. "Mmmm, Fullmetal?" The rumbling of his formal title from his commanding officer left Edward with a full body tremor and a quickened pulse.

Ed reluctantly pulled away from the sweet skin of Roy's neck and collarbone to see him smiling sleepily, calloused hands gently caressing Ed's sides. "Good morning, General." If formal was how Roy wanted to play, Edward would more than happily oblige. He pressed a soft kiss to the other's lips, smirking to himself.

Roy was quiet for a few moments, his fingers carding through silky gold locks. Hair that was so brilliantly colored, it put the sun to shame.  _How can someone so tough and abrasive have such soft, beautiful hair?_ Roy smiled; it was the first morning in a very long time that he woke without a brain splitting head ache and an unsettled stomach. "The best morning."

The blond smiled at that, nuzzling his face into the elder's neck, their chests and hips flush against each other. "I didn't know you liked guys." Ed deemed it appropriate to discuss the logistics of their arrangement  _after_  acting on impulse. Roy rolled his eyes at his subordinate's lack of sensitivity in the matter. A metal finger traced circles around a small pink nipple which hardened in response to the touch.

"I don't," he replied bluntly without thinking. The finger stopped its torturous massage and Roy quickly corrected himself, "I didn't." Roy sat up leaning back on his hands forcing Ed to sit up in his lap. "You're different."

Edward narrowed his eyes skeptically, indicating for Roy to continue with his explanation.  _Why the hell am I different? That bastard better explain himself._  Ed's scowl softened when his lover drew him into a tight embrace and he felt soft lips and warm breath on the hollow at the base of his neck.  _Damn him for being so seductive._

Roy pulled back to look into the golden eyes of the young man before him and almost forgot to speak, getting lost in the gravity that is Edward Elric. "Ed, you've known me for a long time. You know my past. You know about my… my issues and I know yours. I have nothing to hide from you, because you already understand me." Roy let his eyes wander south and back before continuing. "I like you for being you, Ed, not because you are a guy."  _Not that I didn't enjoy myself._ He laughed nervously. "Though, I only ever thought about being with a guy once in my life and I sure as hell didn't imagine me on the bottom." Roy grinned sheepishly and looked away from the blond in his lap, feeling slightly embarrassed.

When he glanced back at Ed, he noticed his very large grin.  _What the hell is he up to now?_ He thought to himself as a cold metal hand pushed gently on his chest, forcing him to lie back down. A tongue was instantly tracing the shell of his ear and he shivered violently as Ed blew cool air over the moistened flesh. Roy could practically hear Ed's mischievous grin.

"I have a proposition for you, General." Ed's voice was quiet and husky in Roy's ear. After a rumble of acknowledgement, Ed continued as he switched his attention to the opposite ear. "If you can go one week without a drop of alcohol, I'll let you do whatever you want to me." Ed trailed small kisses from Roy's ear to his Adam's apple. "Anything you want."  _Something I can live with. It is certainly a motivating reward._

Roy held his lover away from him a bit and searched his golden eyes for deception. Finding none, he simply sat up, kissing Ed fiercely and passionately, running his hands through sunny, yellow hair. "I think I can manage that." He mumbled against wet lips.

Ed pulled away looking rather flushed and feeling more than turned on, their exposed, hard members pressed between them. He was seriously looking forward to this man ravaging him, but he played it off as if he didn't care. He also wanted to help Roy with his drinking problem and this was the reward system approach.

He smiled and rested his forehead on Roy's, eyes closed. "Oh, and Al stopped by this morning to drop off some of my research material before he went to work. So, uh, yeah, he knows about us."

Roy eyes shot open wide. "Shit. I've got to get to work. Hawkeye is going to kill me. What time is it?" The clock on the wall read 9:30; it was well past the time he normally had to be in. He gently guided Ed off of his lap and began collecting his various articles of clothing scattered about the living room. The fact that Al knew about them didn't seem to bother Roy, he was more concerned with having to dodge bullets when he arrived at headquarters. Roy figured that Al would keep quiet about it.

Edward sat back into the cushions of the couch, watching his commanding officer with great amusement. Lucky for him, he had this Monday off and he would spend it going through all of the books Al brought.

With his shirt untucked, buttons all mismatched and hair sticking up in random directions, Roy looked so disheveled that Ed couldn't stop himself laughing. Looking rather put out, Roy pouted. "Well, while you are sitting there laughing your little head off, I'm going to work."

"Who are you calling little, you bastard?" Ed scoffed with a slight trace of a smile.

Roy was smiling too and he leaned down for a quick, good bye kiss. "I wouldn't exactly call you little Fullmetal." He cast his gaze downward and quickly back to bright golden eyes to indicate his meaning. "One week." One last kiss and Roy was heading to the front door.

"If you slip up, I'll know Mustang! I'm calling Hawkeye at the office to help keep an eye out for you." Ed called after Roy, grinning from ear to ear.


	7. On a Bender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roy considers a drink.

He spun the pen in his hand for the millionth time that day, cool metal settling in his perpetually warm hand in between rotations. Obsidian orbs bore through the heavy wooden door of his office unseeing as the image of a certain fiery, stubborn blond played behind his eyes. The Fullmetal Alchemist usually commanded all of his attention in one form or another. Be it through paperwork reporting destroyed buildings on Edward's last mission or an argument over the next mission, Roy was used to having the young Alchemist in his thoughts. This time the thoughts were different.

If Hawkeye saw him daydreaming, she surely would not spare him this time. Ed had called the office that morning and he only assumed that it was so she could watch him closely and report back to Ed about whether or not Roy was behaving himself. On top of that, Hawkeye was relentless in her slave driving to complete the mountains of paperwork. It would be a sure death if she caught him drifting off again but he didn't really care though. She had already berated him for being late for work. She neglected to mention the bruises on his face but she still scolded him at once to get to work... He left the piles alone.

Roy couldn't possibly focus on the forms in front of him; he was too busy thinking about what Ed had done to him the night before.  _How did it come to that?_  He ran the scenario through his head over and over. He did not regret allowing Ed to take him in the slightest bit, but he couldn't help but wonder about the events that led up to  _it._

Roy had always cared for the Elric brothers. Ever since he went to their house after the failed human transmutation attempt, he had felt responsible for them. He knew he saw fire in Edward's eyes back then, it was pure determination. He had admired the boy for it. He saw more than determination in Ed's eyes last night.

The general shook his head with a grumble. He couldn't deny that lately their roles were dramatically switched. Edward had been looking after him even though he chose to let himself spiral out of control. While Roy was exceedingly grateful that someone had stopped him from getting into too much trouble every night, his mind went wild trying to think of all the rude things he has said to people while blacked out.  _I can't even imagine the things that I've said to Ed and he still wants me,_ he thought balancing the pen upright on the tip of his finger. He sighed deeply while staring at the tip of the pen.

Roy should have known his first lieutenant would see him slacking. A bullet exploded though the pen on his fingertip and another shot whizzed past just above his head. Tiny metal pen shrapnel scattered everywhere and Roy found his hand and arm splattered in back ink.

In shock, Roy wearily cast his eyes to the woman in the doorway. She smiled angelically at him before speaking. "Get to work, Sir. Otherwise you'll have to stay late tonight." He dumbly nodded his head and she turned to leave, closing the door behind her.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Roy exhaled heavily and slumped back into his chair.  _She sure knows how to scare the shit out of someone. Thank the Gate she is on our side with an aim like that._  Roy crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes at the papers in front of him.

After some time, he grumbled his hatred for the thin sheets stacked high and roughly pulled the top drawer of his desk open in search of another pen as his last one was no longer recognizable as a writing utensil. The drawer was ripped open and all of its contents slid to the front as it jerked to a halt. A small glass bottle rolled from the back of the drawer and bumped gently on the front panel before slowly receding. As if in a daze, Roy lightly placed an index finger on the rounded glass surface to stop its motion, watching the golden liquid within slosh back and forth before it came to a rest.

His body stiffened as the urge to drink said liquid overwhelmed him.  _Old habits die hard._ His fingers enveloped the cool glass to remove it from the drawer. Completely forgetting that he originally opened the drawer for a new pen, he closed it again, sitting back in his chair.

Roy held the small bottle out in front of his face and took a deep breath in.  _Scotch._  He held his breath as he contemplated sipping on the alcohol. His eyes strayed to the grandfather clock in the corner of his office.  _Only 11 am._ Flicking his gaze back to the bottle before him, a photo in a plain black frame on his desk caught his eye. It was a photo of him and Maes back when they were only Major and Captain during the Ishval war, their arms draped easily around each other's shoulders, silly boyish grins on their faces.  _Damn it._ Roy looked back to the bottle of alcohol and reached forward to lay the picture face down.

With a shaky hand he reached up to unscrew the top. The general swiveled his chair to face away from the door of his office and look at the window instead. He held up the golden liquid to his eye incredulously.  _Why do I always have to think of you Maes?_ He of course knew it was because he kept a picture of them on his desk but it always affected him so strongly. Guilt and sadness swirled around him every time and every time without fail, alcohol helped to make him feel better. It made him forget.

"To you, Maes." Roy raised the small bottle high in a mock toast. This drink was not a regular toast in that it was in celebration of Maes' life, instead it was to mute Roy's feelings about the whole situation. In a way it was almost an insult to the life that Maes did live; he wouldn't have wanted to see his best friend like this.

The sunlight streaming through the window caught the golden liquid just right and the light refracted into Roy's eyes. His eyes watered at the burn from the sun's rays and he blinked them away and he sat forward in his chair, frowning. The color of the scotch reminded him of… his sharp eyes, his soft hair, his bright intelligence and fiery attitude.

"Edward," he whispered and he let the cool glass slip from his fingers. It smashed to pieces on the hardwood floor and covered his boots in wet shards of glass.

Roy dumbfoundedly looked down at his feet, stunned by his revelation. This wasn't about being with Edward physically, he decided. It was about someone caring about him enough to challenge him to sober up. Someone willing to give everything of themselves because they trusted him entirely.

The door swung open behind him and the voice of Riza Hawkeye made him turn his head her way. "Sir! Are you alright? I heard breaking glass. Is everything ok?"

The corner of his mouth raised in a lopsided sort of smile as he regarded his worried Lieutenant in the doorway.

"Yes. I believe that I'll be alright."


	8. Give Me a Shot to Remember

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roy needs a bit of reassurance from Edward.

Expense reports and mission files filled the rest of Roy Mustang's work day. As the afternoon went on, his signature looked less and less like  _Roy Mustang_  and more like  _R scribble, M scribble-line-loop_. If he squint his eyes enough, he could make out his name, but he could care less as he was on the last pile of papers and it was almost time to go home. He was generally in good spirits since finding the scotch in his desk and  _not_  drinking any. He was planning on seeing Ed after work so he scribbled more "R"s and "M"s on dotted lines to get the job done.

Roy brought the stacks of files to Hawkeye's desk. The woman was completely speechless, jaw open wide as she watched him turn away from the desk and collect his coat from the hooks behind the door. Never, NEVER, had the General finished his work the day it was due. As he was adjusting the collar on his long black coat, Hawkeye snapped her jaw shut. "Be safe, sir. Have a good night."

"Of course, Lieutenant." He tipped his head in her direction and pulled the door open to leave.

He heard her voice call to him again as he stepped over the threshold. "Please don't be late tomorrow morning, sir." He simply smiled at her and closed the door behind him.

Once out of the main entrance, Roy stopped at the top of the large stairway, hands deep in his coat pockets. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and turned his face to the sky. His mind felt so clear. He couldn't remember the last time that he finished his paperwork on time. Normally, his head was so clouded and was often victim to an awful hangover headache, a result of irresponsible binge drinking the night before.

He remained that way for a few moments before combing his hands through his black hair. His fingers, interdigitated, rested on the top of his head and he sighed loudly.

An abrupt but familiar voice interrupted his restful moment. "Enjoying the weather?" His head snapped forward to see none other than the Fullmetal Alchemist climbing the steps towards him.

"Edward?" Roy questioned. "What are you doing here?"

Ed stopped two steps down from where Roy was standing and looked up at his lover, something that came easily to him even though he was now nearly the same height as him. His entire body shivered with nostalgia. He had always looked up to this man, even from the beginning, both literally and metaphorically. He smiled wistfully at his younger self wanting to be just like Roy Mustang when he got older. "I heard you were a good boy today, though Hawkeye  _did_  mention something about an incident with a whiskey bottle. Care to tell me about this whiskey bottle, Roy?"

"Later. I don't want to ruin this beautiful afternoon with a story about alcohol." As Edward stepped up to be level with Roy, he was snatched up into a tight hug, causing him to squeak out an embarrassing noise. Roy placed a small but meaningful kiss to Ed's lips.

Edward pushed away from him slightly. "Someone might see." He was not usually one to care what other people think of him, but Ed, the Fullmetal Alchemist, felt weird being intimate with Roy, a General, in public. It could ruin both of their reputations.

"Edward, the news reporters have already written me off as a lazy, disgusting drunkard and incurable alcoholic. I couldn't really give a damn about what they say about my personal life. They can throw me to the wolves, I don't care. If it bothers you, then it won't happ-",

"No," Ed cut him off before he finished the sentence with a wave of the hand. "It doesn't bother me so much. I am just worried for your job, you know?"

"Alright, then. Walk with me?"

"No, I came all the way to headquarters on my day off to not walk home with you." Ed was grinning.

So was Roy. "Well, if you must be such a smart ass, explain why you  _are_ here."

"I actually needed a certain book from the library on bio-alchemy," he explained while patting the breast pocket of his red coat. "I figured that I would just wait for you to get out of work. So yes, I'll walk with you."

* * *

The home that awaited them was dusty, smelly and a complete mess to say the least. Ed, who was a messy person by nature, was utterly speechless. It was disgusting.

Every horizontal surface was home to glass bottles of every variety. Green, brown, clear, broken, intact. All of them empty. When Ed cast a wary eye to his lover, Roy simply shrugged sheepishly, more than embarrassed, and looked away.

"I'll help you clean up in here. I just need to pee first." Edward said, stepping over a pile of old take out boxes to the room he figured was the bathroom. He was right about which room but he stopped in his tracks once he opened the door with a gloved hand to his mouth.

What could not be mistaken for anything but vomit covered the floor around the porcelain toilet.

"What the hell, Roy?" He called back to the entrance to the apartment.

The black-haired man joined Ed at the bothroom door and winced when he saw the scene inside. "I vaguely remember this happening." He said quietly as he stepped in front of Ed to pull the door shut.

"What do you mean you 'vaguely remember this'? Roy, you haven't been home after a night out in at least a week. Has this been here all week?"

Roy shrugged again. "I can't remember properly. I haven't exactly been sober the past couple weeks. This is only the second day I've not had a hangover when I woke up."

"Alright, I understand. But this can't happen again, you got it? You're not a pig, so stop acting like it." It sounded as if he was scolding a child but Roy deserved all of it. "I've said I'll help you clean up but with a job this big, I think we'll need dinner too. I'll run out to get some Xingese noodles, your favorite, right? Don't look so depressed, I'll be back soon." With that, Roy was left alone in his messy apartment.

He rushed into the bathroom as soon as Ed was gone and started to clean the old vomit as fast as he could. He was already ashamed enough; he didn't need Ed to have to clean it up for him. When he heard the front door open again 15 minutes later, Roy had already finished cleaning the bathroom and had moved on to the bedroom.

When Ed came in. he had to move some of the bottles from the counter and into the bin in order to set down the noodle boxes. After finding a space for their food, Ed called out.

"Roy? Where are you?" No answer. Ed walked down the hall and poked his head into the bathroom. He noted the fresh lemony smell of bathroom cleaner and smiled sadly. "Roy?" He called again.

"In here." A voice answered from behind the door across from the bathroom. Edward slowly eased the door open and saw Roy hunched over some scraps of blue and gold fabric on the floor. "I don't remember doing this," the man stated quietly as he turned to Ed, bits of blue and gold cloth hanging in his fingers. One piece had three golden stars fastened to a gold stripe. Ed instantly recognized the pattern to be from the shoulder of the Amestris army uniform; a gold stripe and three golden stars for a general. On the rug in front of Roy lay short pieces of the gold cord that adorned the right shoulder of an officers outfitting. The ends of each two inch piece were frayed and ripped.

Ed knelt next to Roy and gently took the shredded cloth from his hands. He reached out for the military coat to which the stars belonged and held them up alongside each other.

"You can get a new—"

"That's not the problem." Roy said angrily, ripping the coat from Ed. " _I_  am the problem. This is why I never want to be alone after I drink, nothing good ever comes of it." He shook the destroyed uniform in Ed's face. "Ed, I  _do not_  remember doing this. I barely remember destroying my bathroom. I couldn't even tell you the last day that I actually was home here."

Again, Ed removed the coat from Roy's grasp and placed it behind him on the floor to be forgotten. With steady hands under each elbow, he helped the General to his feet. The intact military coat Roy was currently wearing was slowly being unbuttoned, Ed's yellow eyes following his fingers downwards.

"I don't deserve to be a general, not with the way I've been acting. I think… I think that is why I did this. I don't remember it, but that is the feeling I get when I see it here." He indicated the discarded uniform on the floor with a wave.

"Don't say that." Ed said sharply, his gaze now focused on Roy's face. "You didn't get to this position by being a bad person. You didn't pay anyone off to get here." The coat was removed and tossed onto a chair next to the oak dresser. "The people who work for you, they follow you because they believe in you and support what you believe in." The buttons of Roy's white dress shirt were now undone and his skin prickled at the cool air. "You think Hawkeye would deal with you being like this if she didn't truly believe in you? You think Havoc regrets the day you two fought Lust?" Roy winced at the memory, staring down at the floor. "They are with you because they love you."

Ed ran his fingers up Roy's torso and pushed the shirt off of his shoulders. Roy shivered as it fluttered to the floor. With a firm but gentle finger to the elder's chest, Ed pushed him backwards and onto the bed. He proceeded to remove his own shirt as he continued.

"Hell, you were the one who told me back when I was still in a wheelchair, that if there was even the slightest chance Al and I could get our bodies back, that we should do it. You had barely just met me and you gave me the speech of a lifetime. You basically told me to get up off my ass and try harder." He snorted as he crawled onto the bed to kneel above Roy with his legs straddling the other's hips. "I've come to terms with the fact that I will have automail for the rest of my life now, but if it weren't for you, I'd probably still be in Risembool feeling bad for myself as a cripple."

Edward kissed Roy on the lips very gently and traced an automail finger along fine collarbones. "You have every right to be where you are now, don't ever doubt that. This thing you are going through, it'll get better." He kissed him again. "I'll help you—ooof"

Roy pulled Edward to him tightly, wrapping his arms around him completely and burying his face into golden hair. "It's already better." Tears accumulated at the corners of Roy's eyes and despite him trying to hide it, Ed saw one glistening drop slide down to the pillow.

"I know." Feather light kisses graced each of Roy's eyelids eliciting a tiny whimper from the man.  _Damn the way he makes me feel,_ the General thought.

Ed grinned to himself. "Let's not dwell on the past for now though." His flesh hand moved down to the waist of Roy's trousers and began to undo the button. Roy was half hard and once he was exposed, Ed ground his hips down on him and roughly nibbled on his clavicle at the same time. "Congratulations on your first official day of being sober." Ed sucked at the bite mark firmly. "Only six more days to reach your goal, Roy."

Roy's head lolled to the side as cool metal fingers rolled a nipple between them and he thought about the promise Ed had made him if he could stay clear of alcohol for one week. As amazing as it felt to have Edward ravage him, he had plans of his own for the blond when he finally got his way, he couldn't think of them now while he was being teased so torturously, but he knew they would both enjoy it.

Ed continued to make Roy squirm under him with tongue and fingers alike; the Xingese noodles and excessive amounts of empty bottles remained forgotten in the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of this fic, but I wrote more in another story. It isn't finished yet. I'm waiting for my muse.

**Author's Note:**

> You may have noticed I've mixed events from both the 2003 and 2009 anime for ultimate depression. Sorry Royboy.


End file.
